Nollywood actor Kalu Ikeagwu has shed light on why toxic relationships continue to thrive in Nigeria, despite the existence of laws meant to protect victims of domestic violence.
In a candid interview with Sunday Scoop, Ikeagwu, who revealed that he had once been in a toxic relationship, spoke on the challenges surrounding the issue and how he managed to walk away from the situation.
He stated, “I think raising awareness about domestic violence and toxic relationships is a good thing to wake people up to the reality that these two maligning issues are on the increase in society.
However, I think a deluge of media coverage on domestic violence would have little or no impact if the cause of the prevalent violence is not addressed.”
The actor emphasised that while existing Nigerian laws are capable of protecting women and children, the real problem lies in enforcement.
“I feel that Nigerian laws are sufficient enough to protect women and children from domestic violence but is the justice system and the authorities doing enough to protect them? I don’t think so. There is a lack of will for various reasons— political and otherwise— to adequately enforce the law to punish the perpetrators of violence and deter would-be offenders. This could be the major reason for the increase in domestic violence.”
Reflecting on his own experience, Ikeagwu admitted to once overlooking warning signs in a toxic relationship.
“Yes, I have experienced toxic relationships and ignored red flags, as most young people would. But, I learnt very quickly to spot those red flags early on and to never assume people can or will change. A leopard does not change its spots.”
Recounting how he managed the situation, he credited his faith and emotional restraint.
“The fear of God kept me in check. I remained calm, removed all emotion from the situation and maintained complete control until the escalation died down. Today, I am much the better for it. I thank God I trusted Him through the process. I am still benefitting from it till tomorrow.”
He also urged people to seek partners with a genuine fear of God, stressing the importance of being equally committed to the same values.
“There is no point being a hypocrite demanding from someone else what you refuse to touch.”
Ikeagwu highlighted the role of family background in shaping individuals.
“Family background checks are also important. A person is the product of the family they come from. A violent or dysfunctional family can only produce a violent or dysfunctional individual,” he said.
