It is not the everyday rape story you hear in any society but you will be convinced that men can be victims of rape and sexual violence.
Speaking from experience, two African men, took the bold step to narrate their ordeal in an interview with BBC Africa.
Although the African society is not friendly to male victims, Onyango Otieno, a health masculinity ambassador, lived through the stigma to narrate his ordeal.
Otieno was raped as a 20-year-old, his first-ever sexual experience, and suffered depression as a result before discovering he contracted a sexually transmitted disease ten years after.
“I was not angry when the abuse happened, I was confused. it had been my first sexual engagement and it came in such a harrowing experience. I ended up getting a sexually transmitted infection. It dawned on me 10 years later, after my rape ordeal, that I had actually been violated because I had been going through therapy and it was during the therapy process that I actually realised that something has happened to me back then,” he said.
Novandu Marandu, founder, Linda Community, was raped on multiple occasions as a six-year-old child and was unable to speak up.
“I did not talk about the rape when it happened the first time, the second, the third, not even the fourth time. In our society, there is insufficient information provided to children on what a grown-up can do with them,” Marandu said.
“There are so many people who actually ridiculed me when I came out with my story. Most of them happened to be men because they do not think a boy or a man can be raped. Most of them think I actually enjoyed the experience. I had people I trusted who I could talk to and I was lucky, but I also realised that for many men out there that was not the reality. And that was one of the reasons why I started voicing out my stories,” Otieno added.
Having come to terms with this violent act and lived through the stigma, Otieno has created a support structure for men of African descent in Kenya, to widen the network of support groups in order to help others who are afraid to speak up.
“I am happy, strong, healthy, productive and the fact that I have done a lot of the inner work is one of the reasons why I am even able to do this advocacy now because I am not particularly very affected bu the stories I hear every day.
“Society might not be ready for our stories right now but it is our stories that will get societies ready,” he said.
According to Marandu, “Right now, I do not feel like giving up. I reached a point and said it was enough. I joined a group of men who are also victims of sexual abuse.”
