Media personality, Toke Makinwa has said that closure is a trap to promote toxic behaviour in a relationship.

Sharing on Instagram, Toke Makinwa spoke against allowing those who have hurt one before to explained n why they did it.

According to her, closure gives them the chance to soften the blow they felt.

She shared:

“Let’s talk about it, as I grow older I find that to me, closure is a trap to promote toxic behavior. It’s ended, it hurts, why do I need you to explain why you couldn’t treat me well? Not only relationships, even in family settings, meeting up with someone who abandoned you as a child to hear why they couldn’t be an adult inflicts more pain than healing.
in the past I’ve often times felt like not having closure limits you from moving on till I realized that it’s all in the mind. They left, it hurt, you survived and your healing is your right. I don’t know it all but I feel like closure is giving the people that hurt us an opportunity to soften the blow, we let them justify their bad behavior at our own expense, we relieve them of their guilt entertaining it and hurt ourselves even deeper. like heyyyy you broke my heart and treated me like shit but I get coconut head, I no dey hear word. And those people that ask if we can still be your friends after a break up, Do you even know the definition of friendship? Pls discuss as I want to also learn.”

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Let’s talk about it, as I grow older I find that to me, closure is a trap to promote toxic behavior. It’s ended, it hurts, why do I need you to explain why you couldn’t treat me well? Not only relationships, even in family settings, meeting up with someone who abandoned you as a child to hear why they couldn’t be an adult inflicts more pain than healing. in the past I’ve often times felt like not having closure limits you from moving on till I realized that it’s all in the mind. They left, it hurt, you survived and your healing is your right. I don’t know it all but I feel like closure is giving the people that hurt us an opportunity to soften the blow, we let them justify their bad behavior at our own expense, we relieve them of their guilt entertaining it and hurt ourselves even deeper. like heyyyy you broke my heart and treated me like shit but I get coconut head, I no dey hear word. And those people that ask if we can still be your friends after a break up, Do you even know the definition of friendship? Pls discuss as I want to also learn. Watch full clip on my YouTube channel, link is in my bio. Loving my yellow dress from @zivalagos ?? #vlogwednesday #Tmthevlogger

A post shared by Toke Makinwa (@tokemakinwa) on Sep 23, 2020 at 9:35am PDT